You will have noticed that Argentine television is full of cooking programs and reality shows. From “Morfi” to “Masterchef”, going through “Argentine Chefs”, “Pasaplatos”, “Cooking School”, “Ariel in her sauce” and about 500 more. Even Gato Silvestre, who is a political journalist, hosts a program called “La cocina del Gato”. Novels and books disappeared fictional units.
Today the rating does not go through Tinelli’s hidden cameras, nor through Pepe Soriano’s scenic prowess, but through the vitel toné by Narda Lepes and the lemon pudding from Maru Botana.
The kitchen has invaded TV and very soon it will take care of football. It won’t be long before programs like “Cooking with Goycochea”, “Friendo churros con Ruggeri” or “Roast smoke” with Caruso Lombardi.
But none of that surprises us. Our everyday football has several “edible” expressions: if they score a goal they put a “cucumber” in us and they can say that our defense is a “flan” and we “ate” the feints. If you don’t run you don’t have an “egg”. If you don’t give the pass, they yell at you “Pass it, morphon”, and if you screw it up, some narrator challenges you for “the one you devoured.”
Also, in the gastronomic sense of the term, soccer had memorable teams like the Dutch “Clockwork Orange” or the “Merengues” of Real Madrid, and in our country there are fans of “noodles” (Talleres de Córdoba), “calamares” (Platense) “salaítos” (Argentine from Rosario), “brewers” (Quilmes) or “milkmen” (Tristán Suárez), to name a few.
The nicknames of our footballers with food names are a separate dish. From the recent world champions “Fideo” De María and “Huevo” Acuña, to the historical “Mustard” Merlo and “Lettuce” Roa. We have vegetables and fruits such as “Beans” Cubero, “Tomatito” Pena, “Morrón” Rotchen, “Lettuce” Alfaro, “Cebolla” Loscri, “Kiwi” Rivero, “Coco” Capria or the “Bean” Lux.
Soccer players with carnivorous nicknames, the specialty of Lisandro “el Carnicero” Martínez, such as “Puchero” Varacka, “Pancho” Sá, the “Pollo” Soriano, the “Goat” Pavoni, the “Chori” Domínguez or “Panchito” Guerrero. Others more linked to the daily breakfast such as “Milk” La Paglia, “Galleta” Suazo, “Manteca” Martínez or Jorge “Invoice” Broun.
For lunch we have many more like the “Huevo” Rondina, the “Sopa” Aguilar or the “Spicy” Pereyra, in addition to Diego Polenta, Javier Capelletti and Agustín Almendra. And for dessert other sweeter nicknames such as “Chocolate” Baley, “Bombón” Rosada, “Golosina” Pisculichi or “Cucurucho” Santamaria.
Save, because as we continue like this, the football matches will be broadcast by the channel “El Gourmet” and they will report them Donato De Santis and Damian Betular, that give more rating.